What about you?

 

In todays business world, many women think they are worth less money then they really are.The Good Girl Syndrome causes women to undervalue their services and abilities. Good girls also accept less money. (Good girls dislike negotiation!) They may think, "Be happy with what they offered me. Its not too bad!" Self-employed women often struggle with both pricing their service high enough and standing firm on rates when they are questioned. And good girls fear raising their rates. Images of disgruntled, angry or inconvenienced clients fill their heads. Or worse: they fear losing clients -- clients with whom they may have long stranding relationships. It is much easier to not rock the boat and maintain the status quo.

 

Where does the good girl come from? 

 

For one thing, service to others over care of self has been taught to women for millennia! We were encouraged and rewarded for being a good girl. Many of us were raised by mothers who were good girls, and validated this way of being.Society has also supported the Good Girl Syndrome. (Good girls make it so much easier for other people.)

 

So ask yourself: When has my inner good girl kept me from doing something that would be in my own best interest?

 

Try to come up with at least three examples. Did you not ask for a raise for fear of angering your boss, or wait to raise your fees because you were so worried about your clients reactions? Did you say yes to a client you should have said no to?

 

By becoming conscious of where your good girl has stopped you, you are less likely to do the same thing again. If you are feeling brave, share this article with a friend and ask her where she thinks you've let the good girl interfere with taking care of yourself. And if your internal good girl is costing you money, its time to sit down and have a long chat with her. Is she really making life better for you?

 

The Author